True Confessions

I love coming into Tuesday with nothing much to say.  Those are the good weeks.

This has not been a good week.  I am really struggling.  My old knee injury really flared up this past week, which left me sidelined for much of the week.  The entire weekend was one of enforced inactivity and off-track eating, although all for a good cause — you can read about that adventure here.

I’m  having a really difficult time getting my focus back.  It’s cold and there’s a layer of snow on the ground.  I DON’T WANT to go out and walk in that for an hour tomorrow.  Although I’m loving the results I saw when I was textbook with South Beach, I DON’T WANT to have eggs for breakfast again.  I just want a damn bowl of oatmeal.  There’s a lot going on in LIFE right now, and trying to find the time to focus on training and preparing special meals for myself is, quite frankly, adding to the stress.

Also?  I’m really worried about my knee.  After nearly a week of no walking, it seems better.  But I’ve been down this road many times before.  A slick patch under the cover of snow.  A loose cobblestone I don’t see.  All it’s going to take is one sudden lurch to send me into weeks of pain.  I don’t want to spend my winter sitting on the couch with ice on my knee, popping IB left and right to counteract the pain, putting up with toddler temper tantrums because I can’t manage the stairs to carry someone to his room.  But I also don’t want to chicken out of the Disney Half.  I’m going to move most of my training indoors — ie. elliptical — and plan on two outdoor walks a week in hopes to minimize my potential for injury.  Honestly, I’m feeling quite depressed and down-trodden about this sudden turn of events.

So those are my confessions for the week.  Hopefully next week my Pollyanna-esque twin will be back in charge of my attitude.  Until then, I will fight every day to make the right decisions.