My name is Karena, and I’m a little too close to forty to keep obsessing about fitting into jeans I couldn’t even wear in high school. I spent the majority of my life hating the girl in the mirror. I became an expert at a very young age at fading into the background, at being the chubby best friend, and at putting myself down before someone else could.
There isn’t a diet I haven’t tried. There isn’t a diet I haven’t failed. Let’s try that again — there isn’t a diet that hasn’t failed me.
In March 2010 I stumbled across the term intuitive eating. It has utterly changed my life. Did I miraculously lose twenty pounds when I embraced the concept? Errrr, no. Intuitive eating isn’t a quick fix — it doesn’t work like that. It did so much more than jump start a weight loss. It started me on the path to learning to trust myself. I’ve confronted my very negative body image issues. The change in how I see myself, and how I treat myself, is incredible.
The girl in the mirror isn’t fat and homely anymore. I don’t hate her and tell her ugly things anymore. She is imperfect, but she in beautiful in her imperfectness.
I am imperfect, but I am beautiful in my imperfectness.
You are imperfect, but you are beautiful in your imperfectness.
So, does self-acceptance and self-love equal complacency? Not at all. What it does is shift the focus. My focus is no longer on attaining a certain number on the scale or being able to wear a bikini. Rather, my focus is on a healthy, authentic life. A life well-lived.
It is better to travel well than to arrive. ~Buddha
It’s all about the journey. This is my one life. I’ve spent far, far too much of it trying to be someone I’m not. I’ve spent far too much of it unhappy/hungry/hurting, trying to attaint the end result.
I’m not wasting one more day. I may never make it to the perfect size 6. I may never have a flat stomach. But I will take care of myself and love myself as I am and where I am.
I will travel well.